Being content

Recently in our Sunday School class we did a study called "Too Busy Not to Pray," by Bill Hybels. In his book he talks about the importance of close prayer time and outlines a lot of clear cut examples of how to deepen your relationship with God. I don't know about you, but I'm not the best at remembering to really pray.  Oh, I can shoot the occasional "God, please be with so and so," or "Lord help me with..." But really praying? Not my forte. 

Reading through this book came at a time where we were tackling a major life decision as a family. Whether I would continue to work. I only work one day a week as a nurse practitioner, but for the last several months I felt like it had been a major tax on our family and that it was time to move on. My husband felt that in the future when kids are older I would want this job, so it was important to keep my toe in the door. 

So we decided to not talk and just pray about it for 3 days. Like really pray. Multiple times a day. And spend time listening. That's the hardest part for me. Before really practicing, I would start off trying to listen to God's word and end up making a mental to do list of the day's activities.  Through the practice and discipline of prayer I finally felt like I heard God's voice. Be content. I am sufficient. My husband heard God speaking to just support me 100% in whatever I heard.  

So I left my job. I had a great job, but I am confident that right now, I need to put my all in my family.  And periodically I have those doubts creep into my head.  Is it enough? Am I enough? Should I be doing more? I have dreams about the future, should I start to work toward them now?  For the first time in my life I have no 5 year plan, no idea what the future holds.  But again and again I hear God's voice. Be content. I am sufficient. I only hope I can continue to listen.